TOPIC: Enlivening this Topic

B"H

Hello to all the fellow Girls out there!
I just signed up to this website now. It seems like a cool site, so I wanted to get things moving
around here:
This topic is called "Chill Out" - so lets actually make it a place to chill out!
Whoever is here, make a post, and lets get this forum moving!
Also, tell your friends to sign up too - this could be a really awesome way to make friends and discuss
common issues among us!

Hoping for some positive feedback!

Shvester

Good idea... check out what I found.

Everybody, Somebody, Anybody, and Nobody

This is a story about four people named Everybody, Somebody, Anybody
and Nobody. There was an important job to be done and Everybody was
sure that Somebody would do it. Anybody could have done it, but
Nobody did it. Somebody got angry about that, because it was
Everybody's job. Everybody thought Anybody could do it, but Nobody
realized that Everybody wouldn't do it. It ended up that Everybody
blamed Somebody when Nobody did what Anybody could have done.

B"H

Confusing, yet true!
I liked it!

Shvester

I love these lol so trues.. Had to share them

Adults who complain about how bad the younger generation are really just saying whata bad job they did of educating us!...

I dont think its a coincidence that mourning and morning sound the same...

since when did we replace the word said with was like?

a yawn is a silent scream for coffee...

Fastest way to mess up someones knock knock joke... its open!

bas

Like those quotes bas melech.
Malki I've seen it before, it never fails to make me smile.

We need to get more people here to chill. Guys, call in your friends too.

Posted this in another place but still doesn't make it any less funny!!

NICKNAMES
If Laura, Kate and Sarah go out for lunch, they will call each other Laura, Kate and Sarah
If Mike, Dave and John go out, they will affectionately refer to each other as Fat Boy, Godzilla and Four-eyes.

EATING OUT
When the bill arrives, Mike, Dave and John will each throw in $20, even though it's only for $32.50. None of them will have anything smaller and none will actually admit they want change back.
When the girls get their bill, out come the pocket calculators.

MONEY
A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs.
A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn't need but it's on sale.

BATHROOMS
A man has six items in his bathroom: toothbrush and toothpaste, shaving cream, razor, a bar of soap, and a towel
The average number of items in the typical woman's bathroom is 337. A man would not be able to identify more than 20 of these items.

ARGUMENTS
A woman has the last word in any argument.
Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.

FUTURE
A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.
A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.

SUCCESS
A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.
A successful woman is one who can find such a man.

MARRIAGE
A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't.
A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, but she does.

DRESSING UP
A woman will dress up to go shopping, water the plants, empty the trash, answer the phone, read a book, and get the mail.
A man will dress up for weddings and funerals.

NATURAL
Men wake up as good-looking as they went to bed.
Women somehow deteriorate during the night.

OFFSPRING
Ah, children. A woman knows all about her children. She knows about dentist appointments and , best friends, favorite foods, secret fears and hopes and dreams.
A man is vaguely aware of some short people living in the house.

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY
A married man should forget his mistakes. There's no use in two people remembering the same thing!

(from aish)
The doors:

Chaim Yankel checked into a hotel for his first ever hotel stay. He goes up to his room and five minutes later, he calls the desk and says, "You've given me a room with no exit. How do I leave?"

The desk clerk says, "Sir, that's absurd. Have you looked for the door?"

Chaim Yankel says, "Well, there's one door that leads to the bathroom. There's a second door that goes into the closet. And there's a door I haven't tried, but it has a 'do not disturb' sign on it."

So this guy is chatting with a supervisor at Macy's and says I see so many Jewish people shopping here, I think you would make a ton of money selling Esrogim to them. The Supervisor says we actually did that one year and it was a huge hit because they all sold out, but apparently there was something wrong with the Esrogim because 2 weeks later they were all returned...

hqaha how was peoples Purim?

Mine was good. A lot of running around though. A lot of people I know from Jerusalem came over here so they culd have a 2 day chag. Although last year we went over there my mom didn't want to this year I really wanted to go to the kosel on Purim in JS but my mom was too scared. Besides that it was AWESOME. I'm gonna gain TONNNNNS of weight though lol

so you live in israel, but not the holy land... hmmm wonder if we met?
Purim is amazing here! really superb it was cool to see alot of My rabbi Drunk & the Torah that came out of them. & how they were SOOOOO respectful to their wives. it was sickk.
But it was wierd. I didnt have like a sip of alcohol the whole purim.. not sure if ill do that again!

Perhaps we have met IRL, who knows? I personally do't get drunk, alcohol doesn't really interest me all that much. Besides that I'm on accutane so I'm under strict rules to not touch alcohol.

I dont like getting drunk. but i grew up with a bunch of guys in the house so i like alcohol, a good beer to chillax. i also boreded at a couple who had wine with thier dinner so i acquired a taste . But im really not a fan of getting drunk. I enjoy parting, crazy dancing exct but i dont think you need alcohol to loosen up

I guess that's pne way a girl can like alcohol. IDK, alcohol just isn't a girl thing.

Plus I don't think we have met IRL, (remember I'm admin So if you signed up with your authentic identity- I don't know you.

Buttttt I've got to say that it's very cool that girls don't have to get smashed off their faces to enjoy Purim.

Guess we're lucky that we can REMEMBER it- unlike some of the other gender

And not to make ya'll jealous but Netz at the Kosel is SOMETHING ELSE... As soon as the time came when you could start davening Amida, the whole place fell quiet (and it was fullll!)

Yea- thankful for that experience.

YES MALKI!
Neitz @ kotel is perfection!

Just wanted to say hi:D

and honstly come on yall..Kotel anytime...momosh beautiful

Hi back!
& yes kotel anytime! im in!!!!

I'd join in too!!!

What else do I love about Israel I hear you ask?!?!

Going to sit down at a view which only you've discovered existed!