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TOPIC: Anyone want to give me chizuk? It's so hard

Anyone want to give me chizuk? It's so hard 3 years 3 months ago #672

  • twisted
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and I feel like they totally don't even deserve it whatever....
It's like why is this my problem, why do I have to deal with it, why couldn't hashem give me something else...
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Anyone want to give me chizuk? It's so hard 3 years 3 months ago #674

  • Gingy
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One of the things that really halped me work on my Kibud Av Viaim was the fact that tachlis, Hashem gave you your family for a reason. I know it's hard, you hate it, you are frustrated, and sometimes (or all the time) they don't treat you well, it's ok.

But listen, seriously though- Hashem doesn't make mistakes. Everything is here for a reason, So your parents are your for a reason. God wanted this, and you know God only does stuff for the good. So this must be to your benefit. But ah, it's doesn't feel like that does it? It's hard and draining, etc.
Hard doesn't mean bad. Hard things are difficult, draining, bothersome, and more- but they aren't objectively bad. They are only bad if you define them that way.

So you have to make a decision. Either you can take a deep breathe and say "Ok, God gave this to me for my benefit, to help me become a better person" and try your hardest to make this experience something that will strengthen you.

Or you can choose to become bitter and let it destroy you.
Objective reality isn't changing, you aren't getting different parents, you aren't returning them to the store and getting credit.

Decide what you want to do.
Someimes I pretend to be normal...but then it gets boring.

So I go back to being me.
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Anyone want to give me chizuk? It's so hard 3 years 3 months ago #677

  • Gingy
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That's a different kind of perspective...
It's still hard, I don't even know if I want to accept them.
Someimes I pretend to be normal...but then it gets boring.

So I go back to being me.
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Anyone want to give me chizuk? It's so hard 3 years 3 months ago #708

  • twisted
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Pretty deep stuff....I guess I have to try it, don't I?
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Anyone want to give me chizuk? It's so hard 2 years 3 months ago #946

  • twisted
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bein hazmanim sucks. i cant take being home with everyone and my parents ik im supposed to not say certain thinfs and treat them w/ respect but its so hard. during the rest of the yr, or most of the yr ur in yeshiva or wtvr, but now im home and im rlly strugglin.

i dont know what to do
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Anyone want to give me chizuk? It's so hard 2 years 3 months ago #951

  • StillFighting
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Hey! So I know Bein Hazmanin is over but its still worth an answer... being away for an extended period of time always gives us an extra feeling of independence. When bein hazmanin comes around, besides for being home with authority over us again we also want to do out "our own thing"...
Parents often feel like theyre losing control of their children when they reach a certain age and as teenagers will - fight back.
It might be helpful to include them in your life, sending a text or call of what your up too and giving them a few minutes of day where they can see you still respect them. Its rough. And youre one of few who are facing it head on so kol hakavod. Good Luck for now and for the future!
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Anyone want to give me chizuk? It's so hard 2 years 2 months ago #971

  • Rena
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If you're really struggling perhaps talk to a teacher or a Rabbi.
If you're parents are really hard to deal with, you can get guidance on what is most important to focus on.
It got dark, you think you've been buried but in reality you've just been planted.
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