WHY?!?!? (Plus a poem- “Why can’t the whole world be good?”)

Why?!?!
I think this to myself so many times today.
Why?!?!
I think about it when someone asks how my father is doing.
Why?!?!
I think about it when I hear something else thrown upon my load of tzoros..yet, AGAIN
Why?!?!

Why did Hashem choose me? Why? How..? I mean, like I know he knows everything, but how is he sure that I can handle so much on my shoulders? Why?!? Am I really that strong?

I know, if Hashem brought me to it, he’ll bring me through it. I know.
But that question remains in the back of my mind
And every time someone reminds me, takes me out of being in the moment, it’s like someone dumped it all back onto my shoulders again.

I know we don’t ask why. We don’t ask why cuz if we need to ask why so desperately it means that we haven’t found out what Hashem what’s from us in this situation.

Plus, we don’t know Cheshobonot, the reason of G-d. We don’t know. We don’t ask why. We let Hashem take us by the hand when we feel like we are blind. I have faith, I really do. But…I’d like some human comfort too.

Why can’t the whole world be good?
Dreaming about princess dresses and fantasy lives.
Why can’t the whole world be good?
Of magic, wisdom and fairytale endings.
Is it so wrong?
So wrong to wish, to pretend.
To imagine for a moment.
that the whole world is good.
Of a white dandelion, and it’s seeds lifted through the breeze.
Of the sweet melody the wind makes while passing in the trees.
Is it so wrong?
Why can’t the whole world just be good?

I hope next post to be in a better mood! ;)
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<3 Hadassi